Have you ever noticed that in the Bible, the Israelites basically
repeat their own history over and over? It’s kind of funny. God says, “Trust me.
I want you to follow my plan; I have a new land for you. So they listen, and he
leads the Israelites out of slavery and into the wilderness. Then they stress
out and doubt that God can provide food. But God provides for them anyway. And
then they stress out about the giants in the Promised Land, and God is all
like, “I’m big enough,” and he provides for them and they are able to conquer.
Then they don’t trust that God is enough, so they ask for a king. So God
provides a king. And there are wars, and they don’t know how they are going to
face them, but God still provides. The Israelites
stressed out a lot. They didn’t know what to do. They doubted God. And God still
provided. This happened over and over and over again. I think it’s kind of funny
how they just didn’t seem to get the lesson. I mean, were they really that
stupid? Seriously guys, trust God and you’ll be golden.
But I have a problem.
My story reads something along the lines of the following. I believe
that God called me to go into ASL. So my senior year in high school, I decided
that I wanted to go to a certain school, but that didn’t work out. So I
stressed out about what I was going to do, and God provided me with an answer,
take a gap year. So I said okay, and then stressed out about getting a job. And
God provided me with two wonderful jobs. So now, a year later, I’m at Ozark and
I just finished my fourth week of classes. But classes are hard, and I really
want to make good grades on all my tests. So I stress out a lot. Nothing seems
to work the way I think it should. So I will work until I am stressed to the
max, and then cry out to God because I know I can’t do it on my own. So far, I
have had three quizzes, two papers, two tests, three (small) projects and
twelve memory verses due. I am only one fourth of the way through my first
semester of my first year! I cannot even imagine what my life would be like if
I continued down the stressful path of trusting in myself.
I have been praying about this area of my life a lot. I want
to be the kind of person that trusts so much in God that although there are
times when I don’t know how I am going to manage, I will still trust that God
will provide, and that will be enough for me. So as I continue each day, I will
pray that God will build up my trust in him. And as I continue through the
school year, I will ask those around me to pray also. I think that Paul said
something along the lines of “I covet your prayers.” I appreciate that. Pray
for me that I will be transparent, and honest about what I struggle with. Pray
that I trust in God every day, and in every situation.
Thanks. (:
~Lauren
